Regret/Writing 101

What can I say about regret.  I don’t like the word, it’s kind of a useless emotion.  It’s water under the bridge, the bell that has already been rung.  You can’t go back, you have to move forward.  One step at a time, breathe in/breathe out.  Life goes on, there is no rear view mirror.  Don’t look back.

I’ve tried to live my life w/o regrets.  On the not so great days, I think that maybe I should’ve done things differently.  Maybe I should’ve saved something for myself and not given it all away.  I should’ve taken the time to do what I wanted to do.  I should’ve/could’ve/would’ve.  What would I have done.  I might have gone to school and learned a trade.  You know something that they give you money when you do it.

Maybe I should not have married and had all these children.  Travel the world, I would’ve seen more than the kitchen sink at home and I would not have stood in all of those lines.  You know the lines in the grocery store, lines at the bank, carpool lines.  Or waisting my time sitting in waiting rooms, the pediatrician’s office, the orthodontics office, the school’s office.

No one ever really said thank you, but I never really expected anyone to say that.  I always just thought it’s my job.  Your boss doesn’t usually thank you for the work you do.  He just gives you a paycheck.  No paycheck in this job though but then again I knew that when I signed up for that.

I love/loved being a mom.  I love looking back.  I didn’t miss any of it.  I was a stay-at-home mom, and I loved every minute of it.  I love/loved my kids.  It is/was challenging but last night I said to my husband, “I am responsible for putting 4 lives out in the world, and 1 in heaven.”  I am so proud of myself.  It wasn’t easy but you know it’s worth it by how hard it was.  Being a mom is a hard, hard job.  Not for the faint of heart.

I wouldn’t change one thing about my life.  I can hold my head up with no regrets.  I did exactly what I wanted to do.  I was blessed with being a wife, homemaker & mom and I  am so grateful for that.   I love my husband and being his wife.  I loved being Michael Jr., Lizzie, Matthew & Connor’s mom.   I am a grandmother to 3.  Only 1 knows me, Gabriella but the other 2 will know me one day.  No one can change the DNA.  So no, no regrets here.  Only a huge heart that has loved many.  Blessing ❤

6 Comments on “Regret/Writing 101

  1. Pingback: The Best of 2015, cont. | Scarlett79

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